I just Googled the definition of ‘Reassess’ and it said this, “consider or assess again, especially while paying attention to new or different factors.”
Ok, got it.
The past six months, this word is all that has been coming to my mind.
I am not sure why I had such reservations about acknowledging it.
But the past few weeks spent away and in reading that definition, having it right in my face, I realize that what I wasn’t paying attention to was the new or different factors.
I was focused on all the same old sh-t.
I’d achieved the early goals in my career; working for two of the largest companies in the world, in roles that I enjoyed and learned a lot in.
Yet I was still unhappy.
- Isn’t achieving these major milestones supposed to bring a sense of joy?
- Why am I still feeling inadequate and dissatisfied with the state of my life?
- I thought that checking these wins off my list was going to result in happiness?
When you spend all your time planning and ultimately achieving the goals that you think you want to achieve, it’s pretty upsetting to realize that it doesn’t make you happy.
So this brings me back to the word and definition of Reassess.
Because when I actually took the time to woman up and reflect on it, I realized that the new and different factor was actually me.
Turns out the things I actually thought were important to me, weren’t that f-cking impactful to feeling truly validated both professionally and creatively.
This was my Ah-Ha Moment.
The moment I recognized my change and that I was doing everything in my power to resist the change that was literally me, there was a major shift in my thought process.
This was the reassess.
This is why I left my job and uprooted my life and went away for a few weeks.
To reassess my life, to reassess ME.
How freaking odd of a concept is that?
To recognize that you’re not entirely happy with yourself because you’re not living your truth, but to actually take the time to go deal with that sh-t.
I was so afraid of facing my fear of change that it took me years, months and days to finally do it.
And for the first time in a long time, I admittedly don’t have a perfectly mapped out plan, or a desire to figure one out.
I’m just trying to be. To listen to myself and be intuitive to what I legitimately want.
And forcing that feeling has been both uncomfortable and shockingly focused at the same time.
I spoke about having the luxury to take a time out on my life here, but now I’m revved up and ready to turn the time out in to action.
To define what that honestly looks like for me; the reassessed me and what I truly want.
And I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I feel like a crazy person for allowing my fears to hold me back for so long!
I was this person who spoke of goal-setting and working towards the dreams you want to achieve but I wasn’t living honestly so who the f-ck was I to have any opinions for you?
So the point of today’s post is to share my setbacks with you, with the hope that it brings a sense of clarity to you.
It might take a reassess to admit the things you fear seeing in your life. It might take reading this post. And it might take another six months, another year, another 10.
But I hope that if you any reason you feel you aren’t living the life that was meant for you, that you’re open to being inspired by my moves and make moves of your own.
I’ve recently launched a weekly newsletter where I’ll be diving deeper into these #realtalk conversations because I want to be super open and honest as I have seen firsthand that it’s important to communicate this way with all of you.
You can sign up for the newsletter here and I’ll be sending a little note every Friday straight to your inbox.
Again, you know I love my DMs and am always responding to you via Instagram.
So keep reaching out because I love staying in constant contact with you LOL. But seriously, I love it and let’s keep chatting and supporting one another through the good, the bad and the changes, x.